Final Transformers 5 trailer is garbage…but I still want to see the movie.

God damn it, Michael Bay.

Yet another excellent display of a decent trailer, for what will no doubt be an awful film.

The tone of this trailer is all over the shop. About 30 seconds of tense music over the top of action sequences, followed by a few sort seconds of what is supposed to be a comedic bit, followed by more action drowned out with droning music.

The ‘shot in the chest’ bit was actually pretty funny. This might be the first bearable comedic relief in a live-action Transformers film. Well…I’m hopeful.

 

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For all this trailer’s faults, the final 15 seconds brings it back around. Somehow Michael Bay continues to find one small/interesting aspect to bring to each Transformers movie that makes idiots (like me) want to buy a ticket.

Age of Extinction had Stanley Tucci (That paid off). Dark of the Moon had no Megan Fox. Revenge of the Fallen had a writer’s strike. And, 2007’s Transformers had camera-shots-of-cars-turning-into-giant-CGI-robots, that-were-far-too-close-to-the-pogo-stick-used-as-reference-for-the-animators-to-actually-see-the-transformation (They were learning, cut ’em some slack). Now we get the–not at all Iron Man inspired–magically pulling themselves together gimmick.

So…has he just always been able to do this. Bumblebee’s just had this party trick up his sleeve for 5 movies, and he just didn’t use it. Seems like that would’ve come in handy at some point. Also, this completely destroys any tension whatsoever. Whatever happens to Bumblebee, he’ll just be able to suck himself back up.

(That wasn’t a euphemism, or anything)

Anyway, I’m going to see this. I don’t care what you think of me…What if it’s good–it won’t be, but what if it is? What ten year long rope-a-dope that would’ve been.

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Final Transformers 5 trailer is garbage…but I still want to see the movie.

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